Wellness

Practicing Consent and Safer Sex

Emily Morse

Lesson time 12:38 min

Learn how to practice consent and be a better lover to yourself and others.

Students give MasterClass an average rating of 4.7 out of 5 stars

Topics include: It All Starts With Consent • Practicing Boundaries After Trauma • Practice Safer Sex • How to Talk About Sexually Transmitted Diseases

Preview

[00:00:00.30] ANNOUNCER: This class contains mature content. Viewer discretion is advised. [00:00:10.64] [MUSIC PLAYING] [00:00:17.08] - Your sexual wellness is a very important, you know, aspect of our life. If you are having a sexually healthy relationship and a sexually healthy life, you're going to be more satisfied overall. [00:00:33.74] So hear me out. I think that consent is getting a lot of this, like, here you go, yeah. So I have to ask you at every step, like, can I kiss you? Can I take your shirt off? Can we have sex? Yes or no. I think that people feel like consent is just such a drag. [00:00:48.95] But it actually can be sexy. So here's the thing about consent. You want to make sure that it is clear, coherent, it is willing, and it's ongoing. So it's clear. You're concise. Yes or no. You want to be coherent. So you don't want to be wasted. Make sure you're not on drugs, drinking too much. You want it to be coherent. [00:01:11.18] You also want to be willing. You know, you don't want to be coerced. You don't want to be in a vulnerable situation. You actually have to be willing. It also has to be ongoing. Every time you're with somebody, you cannot make assumptions that because the last time you did a certain sex act and it was OK, that it'll be OK this time. [00:01:32.54] I used to think that if I-- I didn't know that I could say no. For example, if I started having sex with somebody and I thought, oh, I'm not really in the mood anymore or something hurts, I didn't know that I had permission that I could actually change my mind at any time and say, you know what? I was feeling this, but right now, I just kind of want to slow it down a bit. [00:01:58.61] And I think that the more-- again, just like everything, the more that we learn to actually discuss consent and make consent part of any sexual activity that we're having, it's actually really hot. It's not a buzzkill. There's so much to consent, too. It's nuance. So it's the word, and it's saying, like, this is what I'm into, and this is what I'm not into. [00:02:20.13] But I get it. Like, a lot of you might not be there yet. You might not really know, but your body knows. So remember that consent is also about body language. It's about learning to read the cues and being present and in the moment with what is going on sexually, you know, with a partner. We know if they're pulling away. [00:02:41.60] Well, that might-- that could be a no, and if you're not sure, you could ask. I'm sensing that you're pulling away right now so I'm going to take that as a no. Or you could even say, yeah, this isn't something that, you know, I'm into right now. I don't want to be touched in this way at this moment. It's about setting clear boundaries and expectations. [00:03:01.95] So then, this is when consent gets fun. You know what to expect. You know what's off limits, what's on limits. And then you get to play within those areas. OK, so let's say our partner says no to ...

About the Instructor

The host of the long-running podcast Sex With Emily has made it her mission to normalize the conversation around sex and share her judgment-free approach to discovering a more pleasure-focused sex life. In her MasterClass, she helps you learn how to identify what you want, communicate your desires, and discover new sexual adventures. Pleasure is your birthright—it’s time to talk more about sex.

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Emily Morse

In her MasterClass, Emily Morse empowers you to talk openly about sex and discover greater sexual satisfaction.

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