When to Send Save the Dates, According to Mindy Weiss

Save-the-date cards are an announcement of your wedding date, sent out before the formal invitations to give your wedding guests enough time to plan for your big day. The advance notice allows friends and family members ample time to make travel arrangements and book hotel rooms.

“A save-the-date card is a notice that you are giving your guests of the date and the place where you're getting married. It’s the beginning of everything. It’s the first thing that your guests receive in the series of information they will get during your planning process.” — Mindy Weiss

Including save-the-date cards as part of your wedding planning process proves especially helpful if you have a destination wedding or your wedding day occurs over a holiday weekend.

As a rule of thumb, save-the-date wedding cards include just enough information to give your guest list a heads-up about the general details of your wedding date. You can send an electronic save the date via email or a physical card on wedding stationery in the mail for your loved ones to treasure as a keepsake. Include the following information on your cards:

• Date of your wedding: Include your wedding date, so your guests and their plus ones know to save that date in their schedules for your big day.
• General location: As a general rule, save-the-date etiquette dictates a general location (city and state) of your wedding venue at the very least. You may want to include specific information, such as the exact location of the wedding ceremony, especially if you’ve chosen not to have a local wedding and the destination requires your loved ones to make travel plans.
• Names of you and your partner: Your save-the-date wording should include the full names of you and your partner.
• Optional engagement photos: Your save-the-date design may include engagement photos if you have them, but you don’t need to include them.
• Wedding invitation to follow: Make it clear on your card that a formal invitation with RSVP cards will arrive later in the mail.
• Your wedding website: Many modern weddings include a website to provide guests with a central source of information about all their wedding details. Include your wedding website’s URL on your save the date if you choose.

“We don’t want to give away everything. So just put the date, the city and state that it’s in, and don't forget on the bottom to put ‘more information to follow,’ or ‘invitation to follow.’” — Mindy Weiss

“In past times, six months was plenty of time,” Mindy says. As weddings have become more complex, encompassing entire weekends or taking place in far-off destinations, some couples have decided to send save the dates earlier. When you choose to send save-the-date cards depends on the complexity of your wedding plans. Wedding etiquette follows these general rules of thumb:

• Destination wedding: Send save-the-date cards for destination weddings at least eight to twelve months in advance, depending on the complexity of the travel arrangements. Give your loved ones ample time to request time off work, book hotel rooms and flights, and arrange for child or pet care if necessary.
• Last-minute wedding: “If you are planning your wedding very quickly, within a three- to six-month period, you may not even need a save the date,” Mindy says. “Mail your invitation just a bit earlier so that people have the information.”
• Local wedding: For local weddings, you can get away with sending save the dates with slightly less lead time, about four to six months in advance. However, send the cards out earlier if your wedding day will happen during a popular vacation time, such as over the summer or a holiday weekend.

If you choose to send save-the-date cards, avoid making these common mistakes before sending them:

1. 1. Forgetting the couple’s names: “What you need to make sure is on the save the date is—No. 1—who’s getting married,” Mindy says. “Don’t forget to put your names on there. Sometimes people get so excited: Save the date! We’re so excited that there is no name of who’s getting married. Put your name on there.”
2. 2. Including wedding registry information: Avoid the faux pas of including wedding registry information on your save-the-date card. Save those details for the formal invitation and your wedding website.
3. 3. Sending cards to people you might not invite: Be sure to finalize your wedding guest list before sending save-the-date cards to avoid sending cards to people you might not invite to the actual wedding. If you divide your guest list into A, B, and C tiers, as Mindy suggests, only send save the dates to guests in tier A.
4. 4. Stressing about your save-the-date design: Save-the-date cards need not match the design of your formal wedding invitation. Avoid feeling pressured to include more than the essential information and perhaps an engagement photo.
5. 5. Too much information: Avoid overloading your guests with too much information. Limit your save-the-date wording to a few details, such as the date, location, and your wedding website.

A print save the date is a physical reminder for your guests, placed on their fridge or mantle. However, digital save the dates are much less expensive. Here are some factors to consider:

1. 1. Budget: “A great time to decide if you’re going digital as opposed to a mailed, printed save the date is when you have developed your budget,” Mindy says. “Do you have money left over to do a printed? Or is this a great way to save money, here at the beginning?”
2. 2. Logistics: Sending physical save the dates requires that you have mailing addresses for all of your guests. “The thing about digital save the dates, is that it’s very easy to ask the question, ‘Please send us your current address so that we can have your mailing information,’” Mindy adds. “It’s a wonderful place to really develop a list for so many things in your life, not just invitations. This can be your permanent list, even for your holiday cards.”
3. 3. Style: If you’re excited about your wedding stationery, you may want to provide your guests with a teaser in the form of a print save the date. More traditional or less tech-savvy guests may also prefer to receive their save the date via snail mail.

Have a wedding to plan? Learn how to take on the process strategically. Discover Mindy Weiss’s approach to setting a budget, choosing a theme, and sending invitations when you sign up for the MasterClass Annual Membership.