Pegging Guide: 7 Tips for Strap-On Anal Sex

Pegging is a sex act in which one person has anal sex with another person by penetrating them with a strap-on dildo. Sex advice columnist Dan Savage coined the term “pegging” in 2001 to describe anal sex when traditional gender roles are reversed—i.e., a cisgender woman using a strap-on to penetrate a cisgender man. Today, pegging simply refers to anal sex using a strap-on dildo, regardless of the genders of the involved partners.

Pegging can be intensely pleasurable for both parties. The anus and rectum are filled with sensitive nerve endings that are stimulated during anal penetration. When the dildo massages the prostate gland of a penis-owner, they may experience a full-body prostate orgasm. A pegger with a vulva can experience sexual pleasure when their clitoris or pubic mound rubs up against the dildo base while they thrust.

If you’re new to pegging, you’ll need to prepare by selecting the right sex toys and lube.

1. 1. Harness: If you're the pegger, you can choose either a harness that resembles traditional underwear or an adjustable strap-on harness that gives you more control.
2. 2. Dildo: If this is your first time getting pegged, start with a small silicone dildo—you can work your way up to a larger size as you get more comfortable with anal penetration. To facilitate a prostate orgasm, select a dildo with a head specifically designed for prostate stimulation.
3. 3. Lube: For any type of anal play, you can never use too much lube. When picking out a lube, take into account the material of your anal sex toy. If you're using a silicone dildo, use a water-based lube. (Silicone-based lube will cause the silicone in the dildo to deteriorate over time.) If you’re not using a silicone toy, a silicone- or oil-based lube will last longer and have a thicker consistency.
4. 4. Vibrator: If you want additional stimulation, consider slipping a bullet vibrator into the harness for extra sensation.

To make your first pegging experience as enjoyable as possible, consider the following pegging tips.

1. 1. Tell your partner that you want to try pegging. Say something like: "I want to tell you something. I think it would be really hot if we tried pegging during sex. I've been fantasizing about this for a long time—what do you think about that?" Keep your tone open, curious, and nonjudgmental. You’re proposing a change for the benefit of your shared pleasure, not criticizing or complaining. Before you bring up your pegging fantasy, it's also important to make sure the context is right. Don't bring it up right after sex when your partner’s running out the door for work. Make sure you're both feeling good and in a neutral place. Chatting during a walk or long car ride can eliminate the pressure of eye contact.
2. 2. Ease into anal play. If the receiver has never tried anal penetration before, pegging probably isn't the best way to start. If you plan to be the receiver, first experiment with anal play during masturbation using your fingers or a small sex toy (like a prostate dildo or a butt plug). After you get comfortable on your own, let your partner pleasure you in the same manner so you can get on the same page about your likes and dislikes. Easing into anal sex gives your anus and rectum time to adjust to penetration, reducing the risk of anal fissures.
3. 3. Keep it clean. When engaging in anal play, cleanliness is especially important since bacteria from feces can pass to the genitals. For the most pleasant experience, evacuate your bowels before you begin, and shower or use a bidet both before and after sex. Clean dildos and other toys after each time you use them.
4. 4. Ensure that the harness fits properly. The pegger should have as much control over the dildo as possible, which means they should fit their harness tightly to their body while still being comfortable. This ensures that the harness doesn't move around while they thrust.
5. 5. Use lots of lube. As with all types of anal play, it's crucial that you use lube for maximum comfort. First, apply lubricant around the rim of the anus and then inside as well (you can make this part of your foreplay). Once the receiver feels loosened up, apply more lube to the dildo before insertion. For an easier clean-up afterward, wrap your dildo in a latex condom so you won't have to wash the lube off—just make sure to use a water-based lube to prevent the lube from eroding the condom.
6. 6. Choose an anal sex position. Though doggy-style may seem like the go-to position for pegging, it may not be as comfortable as other anal sex positions. Try lying side-by-side with the pegger spooning the receiver.
7. 7. Communicate what feels good to you. Keep an open line of communication throughout the experience. If you're the pegger, start slow and be gentle, only increasing intensity when the receiver is loosened up and enjoying themselves. If you're the receiver, give your partner feedback so they're always fully aware of your likes and dislikes.

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