Sex Terms Glossary From Sex Educator Emily Morse

Emily Morse is the host of the award-winning Sex With Emily podcast. Since 2005, Sex With Emily’s honest, candid conversations about pleasure and intimacy—the first episode included discussions about polyamory and bikini waxes, and an interview with a man named Captain Erotica—has gained the attention of millions of listeners. As her audience grew, Emily expanded into other media. In 2011, she coauthored the book Hot Sex: 200 Things You Can Try Tonight. She starred in the Bravo reality series Miss Advised the following year. Since then, she’s written a column for Glamour, appeared on The Today Show, and released a smartphone app. Fifteen years into its historic run, Sex With Emily, widely cited as the longest-running sex podcast in history.

Emily Morse has made it her personal mission to liberate the conversation around sex. To help with her goal of rebranding sexual communication, she's compiled an official Emily-approved sexual dictionary.

1. 1. ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts): Negative self-talk during sex or masturbation, which can limit or stifle sexual exploration and fulfillment.
2. 2. Compliment sandwich: A strategy for constructive critique within a sexual relationship. Start with an affirmational lead-in (“I love the sex we’ve been having lately”) followed by something you'd like to try or change (“It makes me want to try something new”) and end with another positive statement (“I can’t wait to do this with you”).
3. 3. Desire discrepancy: When a couple has mismatched libidos.
4. 4. Edging: The process of learning to control ejaculation for penis-owners, achieved by reaching the precipice of orgasm, then stopping stimulation (see also: squeeze technique).
5. 5. Elevator pitch: A brief talk wherein you tell your partner about a fantasy and propose making it into a reality.
6. 6. Feel-good hormones: Oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, prolactin, and endorphins—the chemicals released as a psychological response to orgasm.
7. 7. Four stages of arousal: A theory from sex researchers Masters & Johnson proposing a linear sexual response cycle consisting of excitement, plateau, orgasm, and resolution.
8. 8. G-area: An area 2 to 3 inches inside the vaginal canal which, when stimulated, can lead to pleasure and sometimes orgasm. Medical evidence of the G-area—often called the G-spot, short for the Gräfenberg spot and named for gynecologist Ernst Gräfenberg—remains limited due to longstanding gender disparities in health research, and its entire existence has been called into question in recent years.
   
9. 9. Kegels: Pelvic floor exercises that both penis-owners and vulva-owners can use to strengthen sexual muscles. These can positively affect orgasm, prostate health, incontinence, and overall sexual pleasure.
10. 10. Lust phase (or honeymoon phase): The initial six to 18 months in a new relationship, when partners typically have more sex.
11. 11. Mindful masturbation: The process of using masturbation as a method to explore sexual response to various simulations, like erogenous zones and personal fantasies (see also: sexual wellness).
12. 12. Orgasm gap: The disparity in orgasm frequency between penis-owners and vulva-owners.
13. 13. Orgasmic potential: All of the orgasms in your future.
14. 14. Penis-owner: People with penises (it’s not just cis men).
15. 15. Responsive desire: A theory of arousal, proposed by sex researcher Rosemary Basson which suggests that sexual desire is triggered by touch, affection, and romance and that it is non-linear.
16. 16. Sexual bucket list: The top sex acts you'd like to try. Write them down and share them with a partner, if you've got one (or more).
17. 17. Sexual menu: All the sex acts you see as being possible. For each individual sexual encounter, you and your partner can choose a few.
18. 18. Sexual roadmap: Your unique turn-ons and kinks.
19. 19. Sexual wellness: Sexual health, both physical and emotional. Sexual wellness is understood as an important part of overall health and wellbeing.
20. 20. Squeeze technique: A method of edging for penis-owners. This means stopping stimulation when the penis-owner nears ejaculation and squeezing the top of the penis (where the glans meets the shaft) until the feeling passes.
21. 21. The three T’s: Emily's three must-haves for a healthy discussion about sex between partners: timing (when you have sex), turf (where you have sex), and tone (how you have sex).
22. 22. Unlocking your orgasm: The process of using masturbation for self-discovery—and teaching yourself to have an orgasm.
23. 23. Vagina: The vaginal canal; the "inside" of the vulva.
24. 24. Vulva: The clitoris, labia, urethral opening, and vaginal opening; the "outside" of the vagina.
25. 25. Vulva-owner: People with vulvas (it’s not just cis women).
26. 26. Yes/no/maybe list: A list of sex acts on which you and/or your partner can mark "yes," "no," or "maybe," indicating an individual or shared appetite for specific acts.

Craving a little more intimacy? Grab a MasterClass Annual Membership and learn more about open communication with your partners, experimenting in the bedroom, and being your own best sexual advocate with a little help from Emily Morse (host of the wildly popular podcast Sex With Emily).