Self-Talk Definition: 6 Ways to Practice Positive Self-Talk Daily

Self-talk is the internal dialogue you have with yourself—the unspoken thoughts you have throughout the day. Positive thinking often leads to positive self-talk. Positive self-talk occurs when your inner voice uses positive words to process thoughts, beliefs, and ideas. Conversely, negative thinking leads to negative self-talk. Negative self-talk occurs when you use self-defeating language or affirm negative biases about yourself, others, or the world around you. Positive self-talk may lead to lower levels of depression and anxiety, healthier relationships, and improved self-image.

Positive self-talk is an inner dialogue that focuses on positive thoughts. For example, when you make a mistake, you think, “I made a mistake, but I‘m learning from this experience, and I know I’m capable of doing better in the future.” Motivational self-talk also falls into this category. For instance, when you have a big presentation at work, you might think, “You‘ve got this—you are a good communicator, and you know what you’re talking about.”

Negative self-talk occurs when you ruminate on negative thoughts. Rumination exacerbates self-doubt and can erode your mental health. For example, when you make a mistake, you think, “I always mess things up—I’ll never be good enough!” This line of thinking is self-defeating—it perpetuates self-doubt and stands in the way of your growth.

Negative self-talk is often polarizing, meaning that you only see things as either good or bad—there’s no middle ground. Catastrophizing—always expecting the worst—is a common form of negative thinking that can lead to negative self-talk.

There are several notable effects of self-talk. Some of the most important are:

1. 1. Self-talk can help your relationships. The inner dialogue you have with yourself can carry over into your relationships. A person who practices positive self-talk is likely to exude confidence, have an optimistic attitude, and bring out the best in others. Couples with an optimistic outlook on life may exhibit higher levels of cooperation.
2. 2. Self-talk impacts your self-image. The way you speak to yourself shapes how you see yourself. Speaking kindly and focusing on your best qualities can improve your self-esteem and boost your self-confidence.
3. 3. Self-talk is an effective coping strategy. Positive self-talk can effectively reframe stressful situations by helping you look on the bright side, prioritize positive thoughts, and have confidence in your abilities.

Cultivating positive self-talk can take practice. Here are six practical strategies for using positive self-talk every day:

1. 1. Check in with yourself throughout the day. Set reminders to check your self-talk throughout the day—especially when you’re having a bad day. Take a moment to pause and consider whether you’re focusing on positive or negative things. Ask yourself, “What would a loved one say to me if they knew I was talking to myself this way?” If you start to fixate on negative thinking patterns, use your coping skills to flip the script.
2. 2. Incorporate positive thinking into your routine. Make positive thinking a part of your daily routine by listening to an uplifting podcast, reading an inspirational book, or writing in a journal. Try these gratitude journal prompts.
3. 3. Refer to yourself in the second or third person. Creating psychological distance in your self-talk can improve your self-image and performance. Instead of speaking to yourself in the first person, try using second- and third-person pronouns. For example, instead of saying, “I am a kind person,” say, “You are a kind person.”
4. 4. Start your day with positive affirmations. Rehearsing positive statements first thing in the morning can set you up to have a positive outlook for the rest of the day. Try rehearsing positive self-talk statements in the mirror while you get ready. For example, you might repeat to yourself, “You are smart. You are capable. You are kind. You are loved.” Learn more about positive affirmations.
5. 5. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good. The company you keep can have a massive impact on your self-image. If your friends are negative, self-defeating, and overly critical, you might consider seeking companions who can encourage you to prioritize your well-being and practice self-love.
6. 6. Work with a professional. Starting new habits can be challenging. If you need help implementing positive self-talk strategies, consider consulting a healthcare professional, such as a therapist or counselor. They can help provide examples of positive self-talk and help you develop self-care habits.

Figuring out what you want to do next and how to get there? Learn how to embrace your passions with a MasterClass Annual Membership and find the grit to take control of your life with exclusive access to video lessons taught by the world’s best, including Robin Arzón, Elaine Welteroth, Hillary Rodham Clinton, RuPaul, and more.