Wellness

Reassurance in a Relationship: 3 Examples of Reassurance

Written by MasterClass

Last updated: May 13, 2022 • 2 min read

Whether you’re in a polyamorous or monogamous relationship, you or your loved one may need reassurance at times. Learn more about reassurance in a relationship.

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What Is Reassurance in a Relationship?

Reassurance in a relationship is when a person needs confirmation of their partner’s feelings. This can look like questions such as “Do you love me?” or “Am I your best friend?” An individual’s need to verify their partner’s love may stem from past relationships or their dynamic with their primary caregivers growing up.

As trust develops in intimate relationships, each partner should become attuned to the other’s love language, offering tenderness and appreciation to support their partner’s well-being, resulting in the need for less reassurance. While words of affirmation or physical affection are valuable ways to receive love and support, avoid seeking constant validation from a significant other to define your sense of self-worth.

3 Examples of Reassurance in a Relationship

Romantic relationships can be hard work, but reminding your partner why you love them fosters a strong connection. You can reassure your partner by:

  1. 1. Expressing compliments: Complimenting your partner can help them feel confident and supported.
  2. 2. Spending quality time together: While encouraging words are a key component of reassurance, actions are also essential. Show your significant other they’re a priority by making time in your schedule to be with them. Being physically present in your relationships reminds your loved ones you’re there to support them. Listening when a partner has a bad day is another way to support and reassure them.
  3. 3. Verbalizing your love: Using phrases of affirmation, like saying “I love you” daily, is a simple way to express your feelings.

How to Recognize Dependence on Reassurance in a Relationship

Although reassurance is an essential part of healthy relationships, relying on constant reassurance is a red flag. If your partner needs incessant compliments to overcome their insecurities, it may signify an unhealthy attachment style.

  1. 1. Assess your interactions with your partner. Consider your daily interactions with your partner. If reassurance takes the place of self-love, they may depend on others for their sense of self-worth. In a romantic relationship, low self-esteem and overthinking tendencies can cause a person to rely too much on their partner to feel special.
  2. 2. Promote self-care in your partner. To help your partner reduce the need for reassurance, encourage them to find outlets for self-care. Small moments of independence and self-love help them gain the confidence to feel secure in their relationship with you. As you continue to reassure your partner, motivate them to set healthy boundaries.
  3. 3. Understand different attachment styles. Attachment styles are the emotional and physical behaviors you adopt to interact with others. Some attachment styles cause individuals to develop relationship anxiety and become dependent on reassurance. For example, individuals with an anxious attachment style tend to exhibit clingy behavior, seeking constant validation from their partners. On the other hand, secure attachment refers to individuals who do not depend on affirmation from their significant other to feel satisfied.

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