How to Last Longer in Bed: 7 Tips to Last Longer in Bed

These seven tips may offer some help if you’re a penis-owner looking to last longer in bed:

1. 1. Wear a condom. It is always advised that you wear a condom during sex to prevent the spread of STIs. However, if you don't already use condoms in your sex life with your partner, consider wearing one to weaken your sensation level during sex so that you're less likely to experience premature ejaculation. You can even find special "desensitizer" condoms that have a numbing agent (typically lidocaine or benzocaine) on the inside of the condom to help you from getting excited too quickly. If you decide to apply a numbing cream to your condom, make sure to apply it to the inside to avoid desensitizing your partner.
2. 2. Do kegel exercises. Studies show that kegel exercises—commonly called pelvic floor exercises—are an easy and discreet way for penis-owners to improve the strength of their pelvic floor muscles, which increases sexual stamina and ejaculatory control. For penis-owners, kegel exercises involve expanding and contracting the same muscle that you use when you start and stop urinating. Simply tighten and hold this muscle for 10 seconds and then release. Do ten repetitions to complete a set, and do three sets per day.
3. 3. Practice edging. Edging is a masturbation method that helps you gain better control of your sexual performance. To practice edging while masturbating, bring yourself right to the precipice of orgasm and then completely stop all stimulation until your excitement level has waned. Once your level of arousal decreases, start masturbating again and repeat this cycle about three times before ejaculating. Pay close attention to the sensations in your penis as you come close to climaxing, which can help you to better recognize these sensations and control them. One way to help yourself edge is by practicing the squeeze technique, which restricts blood flow to the penis, briefly decreasing your arousal and delaying ejaculation. To practice the squeeze technique, gently but firmly squeeze the top of your penis (where the glans meets the shaft) when you can feel yourself coming close to ejaculation.
4. 4. Switch positions. You may find that you reach orgasm more quickly in certain positions, so take note of which ones those are and actively avoid them. To make sure you're taking your partner's sexual experience into account as well, ask them about their favorite positions so you can find a few that are mutually ideal.
5. 5. Ejaculate before sex. If you masturbate about an hour before you have sex, it should help you delay ejaculation during sex with your partner. Instead of masturbating, you can also ejaculate twice in the same sex session, during foreplay. Establish an open line of communication with your partner and let them know you want to orgasm before penetration. After your first orgasm, you'll experience a refractory period where it may be difficult to maintain an erection again for a short amount of time. Once the refractory period is over, you can continue on with the session.
6. 6. Pleasure your partner. Take a break from penetration to pleasure your partner if you’re nearing climax before you’re ready, or if you’re in a refractory period. Use your partner’s favorite sex toy on them, or give them oral sex. Try rimming—also known as oral-anal sex—if your partner enjoys that kind of stimulation. If your partner is a vulva-owner, they may need clitoral stimulation to orgasm anyway, so taking time to externally pleasure them with cunnilingus or a vibrator is essential.
7. 7. Talk to a doctor or sex therapist. If you’re struggling with chronic issues involving premature ejaculation, performance anxiety, or erectile dysfunction—which is when a penis-owner can’t sustain an erection hard enough for intercourse—seek medical advice from a urologist or a certified sex therapist. Medical professionals regularly see patients with sexual health issues and will know how to properly diagnose your premature ejaculation symptoms and guide you towards relief.

Craving a little more intimacy? Grab a MasterClass Annual Membership and learn more about open communication with your partners, experimenting in the bedroom, and being your own best sexual advocate with a little help from Emily Morse (host of the wildly popular podcast Sex With Emily).