How to Be Vulnerable in a Relationship: 6 Vulnerability Tips
Written by MasterClass
Last updated: Dec 14, 2022 • 2 min read
All types of relationships require some level of vulnerability. Learn how to be vulnerable in a relationship to improve communication and deepen your emotional connection.
Learn From the Best
What Is Vulnerability in a Relationship?
Vulnerability is your willingness to practice emotional openness with your partner. Being vulnerable can help you build trust in relationships and develop emotional intimacy between you and a partner. You might feel compelled to respond to life’s challenges by closing yourself off, keeping a tight lid on your emotions, and avoiding situations that can cause you emotional painful. You can learn how to be vulnerable in a relationship by discussing relationship needs with your partner and checking in about your emotions regularly.
Why Is Vulnerability Important in a Relationship?
In healthy relationships, partners take emotional risks. Consider the following benefits of vulnerability for partnerships:
- 1. Vulnerability builds trust. Deep trust is a two-way street, especially in romantic relationships. Both you and your partner must trust each other implicitly. You need to know that your partner supports you and that you can reveal your deepest hopes and fears to them without fear of rejection.
- 2. Vulnerability inspires growth. For relationships to grow, partners need to express vulnerability. Practicing vulnerability allows partners to overcome past experiences, meet challenges, and have difficult conversations. Being vulnerable is a learning process that can lead you and your partner to become closer.
- 3. Vulnerability promotes emotional intimacy. You may find it challenging to open up emotionally to your romantic partner without vulnerability. Being honest about your feelings and personal insecurities can prompt reciprocal behavior in your partner, which helps strengthen the emotional bonds of the relationship on a deeper level.
How to Be More Vulnerable in Your Relationship
Vulnerability requires patience and practice. Consider the following ways to practice vulnerability in your relationship:
- Check in with your partner. Showing your vulnerability means not waiting until a crisis occurs to ask about your partner’s feelings. Asking about your partner’s feelings can go a long way in developing openness.
- Find good models of vulnerability. Take note of the people in your life who can successfully express vulnerability. Spend time with them to learn from their behavior and grow your capacity to be vulnerable in your relationships.
- Go slow. Being vulnerable may challenge you at first, especially if you tend to close off or be emotionally defensive. Take small steps to help you learn to let your guard down. Easing into vulnerability can also help you set boundaries so that you do not go too far and overshare or become overly reliant on others.
- Listen to yourself. People who struggle with vulnerability have trouble paying attention to their wants and needs. Practice daily check-ins and ask yourself how certain situations make you feel—physically and emotionally—and what might help you feel better. You can also keep a journal to track your feelings.
- Seek professional help. Working with a family therapist or a relationship coach can allow you and your partner to tap into your vulnerability skills.
- Validate your feelings. When volatile emotions arise, you might get defensive or immediately offer solutions. Being vulnerable is the willingness to take the time to hear out your partner and acknowledge what they are going through before you react.
Revitalize Your Relationships
Developing relational intelligence and improving communication are essential to boost the quality of your personal and professional relationships. Discover Esther Perel’s approach to resolving conflict, having difficult conversations, and building trust when you sign up for a MasterClass Annual Membership.