How to Ask for Mentorship: 5 Tips from MasterClass Instructors

Mentorship is when a person experienced in a particular field or business shares the benefits of that experience with a mentee, a younger person just coming up or even an older worker with a different set of skills. The role of a mentor is usually to serve as a role model and help mentees set up an action plan to achieve specific career goals, though a mentor can provide guidance in other areas of a mentee’s life as well. Many companies establish a designated mentorship program to pair new employees up with more seasoned mentors to encourage growth and improvement in the company as a whole.

A mentor can make a world of difference in your professional development. Here are some tips to help you turn a professional relationship into a mentorship:

1. 1. Confirm you’re ready for a mentor. Misty Copeland, the first Black woman to become a principal dancer with American Ballet Theatre, says that the first step to mentorship is checking in with yourself: “It’s really about accepting and being ready” for constructive feedback and learning. “When I was younger,” she says, “I just don't think I was in a place where I was mature enough. It didn't matter who came into my life.” Mentorship is the most beneficial when you’re emotionally ready for it.
2. 2. Consider the digital approach. Award-winning journalist, New York Times–bestselling author, and television host Elaine Welteroth recommends using social media to find digital mentors whose career paths you admire. “You can slide into the DMs,” she says. “You can be incessant in your pursuit of getting on someone’s radar, but whether or not they ever respond, know that there is so much value you can glean from curating your own set of digital mentors that you follow, that you study, and that you allow yourself to be inspired by.”
3. 3. Seek mentors among peers. Elaine also suggests looking to your peers, who can make great mentors; while you may think a mentor has to be older and more experienced than you, they don’t have to be. “The truth is, the best mentors can be peers,” Elaine says. “People who are in the struggle with you, that are in the trenches with you, that are figuring out how to do what’s never been done right alongside you. There is a lot of value in authority figures who have been on this road before… But if you are trying to do that which has never been done before, how can you ask somebody to tell you how to do it?”
4. 4. Show confidence and be direct. World-class fashion designer and branding expert Diane von Furstenberg recommends confidence and directness. “Don’t be embarrassed to go to somebody and say, ‘Can you please teach me?’ or ‘Can you please call me?’” she says.
5. 5. Trust your own path. Diane also says you should avoid expecting your path to perfectly mirror anyone else’s. “Every designer has a different path,” she says. “You have to find your door. You have to find the one person that you connect with that is either intrigued by you, or that likes you, or likes what you do. And then you go from there.” There are many paths to finding a mentor and deepening your understanding of your field.

Follow these steps to reach out and ask for mentorship:

1. 1. Identify the right mentor for you. Before you reach out to someone, ask yourself what you want from an ideal mentor relationship. Consider if you want a cheerleader or someone who offers feedback or if you would benefit from working with an expert or someone closer to your situation. Identifying these goals will help you narrow down your options to a few promising candidates so you can find the right person for you.
2. 2. See if your network can connect you. When you reach out to someone outside of your network, you’ll need to decide how to contact them for the first time. Cold emails can work for outreach, but to give yourself the biggest advantage, see if there’s anyone in your network who could serve as a quick connection.
3. 3. Determine the best contact method. Evaluate your situation and determine what method is best to make the ask, whether it is a phone call, email, or in-person conversation. If the person is a new connection, opt for a phone call or email introduction; if you know the person, you can chat with them at the office or invite them out for a cup of coffee.
4. 4. Tell your story. When talking with a prospective mentor, explain who you are and your relationship to their work. That way, the other person knows how much you care about developing as a person and why you reached out to them for help.
5. 5. Be specific about your goals. Be direct with your potential mentor about your plans for the future. Let them know what you hope to accomplish in your career trajectory, how you’d like to do it, and how a perfect mentor-mentee relationship would look for you, including the amount of time you’d like to meet. That way, they know how best to help you, should they agree to mentor you.
6. 6. Start small. A valuable mentorship relationship is about the quality of the time and advice, not the number of meetings. Many good mentors have limited the time or resources to dedicate themselves to an intensive regular meeting schedule with mentees. If your mentor is too busy for a major time commitment, reach out with specific questions or career advice in the first meeting, then follow up as needed until you can slowly build up a stronger relationship. Continue to check in with yourself to determine what you want from the mentoring relationship and how it can best help you.

All you need is a MasterClass Annual Membership and our exclusive video lessons from the likes of Elaine Welteroth (the former editor in chief of Teen Vogue and host of CBS’ The Talk), Issa Rae (the powerhouse multihyphenate behind HBO’s Insecure), Robin Arzón (the lawyer-turned-head instructor of Peloton), and other luminaries who have have embraced the twists and turns on the path to professional success. With their guidance, you’ll learn how to lean into your strengths, follow your heart, and build the career of your dreams.