Emotional Intimacy: How to Build Emotional Intimacy

Emotional intimacy is the vulnerability and trust that significant others build with one another to sustain a healthy relationship. This form of intimacy shows emotional support between romantic partners. Intimate relationships rely on more than physical attraction; building emotional bonds can increase relationship satisfaction and make each person feel appreciated, heard, and loved. A lack of emotional intimacy can make partners feel distant and unloved.

Building intimacy can pose a challenge for partners and married couples, as emotional availability can mean stepping outside their comfort zones. Still, through small steps and relationship coaching, people can more readily tap into their emotions, improving their relationship's overall well-being and mental health.

Physical intimacy, sexual intimacy, intellectual intimacy, and emotional intimacy are the types of intimacy in relationships. Especially critical in long-term relationships, emotional intimacy can help improve different types of intimacy. A strong emotional connection, for example, can support a healthy sex life. Emotional intimacy allows partners to communicate effectively and share their inner selves, developing a sense of security. Partners need to know their significant other will celebrate their achievements and offer support during challenging times.

Emotional intimacy can take many forms. Consider the following qualities of an emotionally intimate partner and examples of how to express emotional intimacy:

1. 1. Appreciative: Expressing thanks is a small act that can quickly communicate how much your partner means to you and how you appreciate their help and support.
2. 2. Vulnerable: Being vulnerable is a crucial aspect of emotional intimacy. Openly expressing your feelings invites your partner to do the same and shows that no topic is taboo.
3. 3. Supportive: Stay attuned to your partner’s needs to build emotional intimacy. If your partner experiences stress, be present and available and volunteer to step in and assist.
4. 4. Thoughtful: Sometimes, it’s the little things that display emotional intelligence: You can buy your partner flowers or gifts, take them out for a date night, or write them a card on a special day or anniversary. Proactively showing affection is an excellent way to express love for your partner.

Emotional intimacy contributes to the success of a sustained relationship. Consider the following methods to build emotional vulnerability in a relationship:

• Ask your partner how they feel. Sharing your emotions is a necessary process in a successful relationship. Ask your partner how they feel, and know they may return the question to you. Be thoughtful about what you share and express. Practicing vulnerability with each other can help build trust in a relationship.
• Change up your routine. Changing daily habits and patterns in your relationship can show new paths outside the comfort zone that may invite greater vulnerability.
• Give affirmations freely. Sometimes, you get what you give. If you readily provide words of affirmation, your partner may return compliments to you and stimulate a stronger emotional bond.
• Keep a journal. You may have an easier time writing down feelings than expressing them outwardly. Keep a journal to connect with your emotions and better understand how to communicate them with others.
• See a relationship coach. Therapists or relationship coaches can help partners better understand how they communicate and show emotional intimacy toward one another.

Developing relational intelligence and improving communication are essential to boost the quality of your personal and professional relationships. Discover Esther Perel’s approach to resolving conflict, having difficult conversations, and building trust when you sign up for a MasterClass Annual Membership.